"We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts, we make the world."-Buddha
Mission Statement:
To create an environment that is a warm and inviting place to share your most heartfelt thoughts. To bring joy and balance into focus as we experience our journey. To encourage curiosity. To build a community connection that encourages our collective spiritual growth.
Creating the space:
I am willing to explore life and my role in it. I will hold no judgments against myself or anyone in the group. I will always honor the integrity of the group by speaking the truth in a kind and loving way. We are all whole and complete just as we are.
All that we are is the result of what we have thought. If a man speaks or acts with an evil thought, pain follows him. If a man speaks or acts with a pure thought, happiness follows him, like a shadow that never leaves him. Buddha
Drawing Out Your Soul
Connecting to your Soul energy
Agenda
Self Esteem/ Self Confidence
Learn to dismantle learned belief
Explore perspectives
Explore Values
Write Soul Sentences
Design Soul Cards
Uncover your Soul thru Art Movement
“Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.”
Self-esteem = sense of personal usefulness + sense of personal worth. It is the sum of self-confidence and self-respect. It is the belief that one is competent to live and worthy of living.
Self esteem is the idea that you have about yourself. It is how much you value yourself and how important you think you are. It is the acceptance, respect, trust and belief in you by YOU.
Self confidence means that you believe in your own abilities. Self confidence is related to self-assurance, you are proud of you own abilities. You are positive; take risks and set goals and reachable standards. With self confidence you have the certainty that you can do it.
Self image is how you see yourself. Self Image is PERCEPTION.
Self image includes:
What you think you look like
How you see your personality
What kind of person you think you are
What you believe others think of you
How much you like yourself or you think others like you
The status you feel you have
Image is perception. How you see yourself is vital because this will affect your behavior, your thinking and how you relate to others. People respond to you according to how confident you are. Your confidence in relationships depends on the image you have of yourself.
How you see yourself is often different from how others view you. Your view of yourself is shaped by your unique thoughts and learned beliefs. You will see yourself in a positive or negative way according to your level of self esteem. You may have a negative view of yourself and if so you are probably highly critical of yourself.
WHERE DOES SELF ESTEEM COME FROM?
How Baby Elephants Are Trained
Elephants in captivity are trained, at an early age, not to roam. One leg of a baby elephant is tied with a rope to a wooden post planted in the ground.
The rope confines the baby elephant to an area determined by the length of the rope. Initially the baby elephant tries to break free from the rope, but the rope is too strong.
The baby elephant "learns" that it can't break the rope.
When the elephant grows up and is strong, it could easily break the same rope. But because it "learned" that it couldn't break the rope when it was young, the adult elephant believes that it still can't break the rope, so it doesn't even try!
Humans operate in a similar way. We learned something about ourselves at an early age and still believe it as an adult. Even though it may not be true, we operate as if it is.
Fortunately, humans are born with the ability to make conscious choices - an important step in changing how you perceive yourself.
Our beliefs and thoughts are the source of the emotions within us.
In any specific event or circumstance, emotions may arise in you that would not necessarily arise in another person. Something that can cause high levels of nervousness and trepidation for you may be a source of great joy and anticipation for someone else. Why would that be? The truth is that you hold a Belief System about:
the way Things are
the way You are
the way Others are, or
the way the World/God/Creator/Universe is.
It is important to distinguish between these “Learned Beliefs” that reside within the subconscious, and “Logical Beliefs” or the truth of what is. (Truth can be proven; it is a fact) that result from conscious thinking, experience and decisions. Somewhere in our experience, we 'learned' that we were "not good at sports" or "not worthy of success" because someone who we looked up to said so, and later events seemed to confirm it. Because these Learned Beliefs are subconscious, we are generally not aware of them. We need to pay attention to our emotions to point the way.
Any time you experience some kind of 'angst,' 'bother' or 'stress,' it is really a form of learned belief though we are never really taught to look at it as such. Notice where and how it feels in your body - tightness in the chest, or a spasm in your gut, or some other pain or discomfort.
The main culprit is actually fear: the stress response is a reaction to perceived danger, after all. However, our fears are often accompanied by sadness, frustration, anger, etc and sometimes these other layers have to be dealt with before the fear can be addressed.
“Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.”
Perspectives: a way of regarding situations, facts, etc., and judging their relative importance
Disempowering Perspectives:
It’s too hard
Protection
Significance
Blaming/Victim
Doubt
Low self esteem
Criticism Struggle
Invalidation
Reaction Fear
Empowering Perspectives:
Respect
Responding
Truth/Self expression Responsibility
Commitment
Trust
Action
Exploration
Contribution
Creation
What are the 3 most powerful perspectives from which you can live your life? What disempowering perspective have you been living from lately?
Life work: Pick an area of your life where a problem has persisted for some time. Discern the perspective and re-frame it.
Values are not just words; values are what we live by. They're about the causes that we champion and the people we fight for.”
Senator John Kerry
What is a VALUE
A value is a belief, a mission, or a philosophy that is meaningful. Whether we are consciously aware of them or not, every individual has a core set of personal values. Values can range from the commonplace, such as the belief in hard work and punctuality, to the more psychological, such as self-reliance, concern for others, and harmony of purpose.
We all have values that determine our decisions and guide our lives. Those who value their individuality take responsibility, are self-reliant and act with self-respect. Those who value truthfulness cannot bring themselves to tell a lie. Those who value family or friendship sacrifice their personal interests for the good of others. Those who value goodness cannot bring themselves to do something they know is wrong. We express values in our relations with other people when we are loyal, reliable, honest, generous, trusting, trustworthy, feel a sense of responsibility for family, friends, co-workers, our organization, community or country. On a more physical level, we may place great value on cleanliness, punctuality, orderliness, accuracy, quality, and physical perfection in whatever we do.
Where Your Values Come From
You inherit some of your values. You learn some values from your parents, teachers, and other influential people in your life. You also take on values from reading and watching TV and from everyday life experiences.
Your values also reflect the values of your physical environment. And they reflect your generation, i.e., the group of people born around the same year as you.
Values last a lifetime. While they may undergo some change through the years, they're fairly stable.
Benefits of Knowing Your Values
Why is it important to know what your values are? Knowing our values will empower you to make better choices.
Not knowing your values creates the tendency to wander, bouncing from one thing to another, all the while trying to figure out who you are. Values are a road map or a GPS for your life.
Knowing your values helps you:
Creates guidelines for your actions. You’re less likely to take the easy way out or chase after short-term gains at the expense of your long-term goals. Helps form priorities in life.
Make good decisions. You quickly know what good choices are for you and what are not.
Find like minded people, environments, and things that support your way of living.
Live with integrity. Integrity here doesn't mean honesty or honor. Integrity means wholeness or completeness - being a whole person. Nothing left out. Being true to yourself
HOW LIFE DATA BECOMES VALUES
Data are mental facts derived from sense observation.
Information is data organized by the physical mind.
Thoughts are specific conclusions or observations drawn from the information.
Ideas are generalized conceptions derived from specific thoughts.
Opinions are thoughts which the mind endorses and the ego identifies as its own.
Beliefs are ideas which the mind endorses and the mental ego identifies with as true for its life.
Attitudes are opinions endorsed and energized by the ego.
Values are idealized conceptions that are endorsed by the personality.
Our thoughts are mental forms of energy which do not necessarily lead to action. Ideas carry the energy of understanding mentally. Opinions carry the power of mental conviction. Attitudes carry our emotional endorsement.
Values carry the power of psychological commitment and determination.
Values come from a deeper or higher center of motivation in our personalities and therefore carry far greater power than our opinions and attitudes.
Example Values
Achievement Friendships Physical challenge Advancement and promotion Growth Pleasure Adventure Having a family Power and authority Affection (love and caring) Helping other people Privacy Arts Helping society Public service Challenging problems Honesty Purity Change and variety Independence Quality of what I take part in Close relationships Influencing others Quality relationsihps Community Inner harmony Recognition (respect from others, status) Competence Integrity Religion Competition Intellectual status Reputation Cooperation Involvement Responsibility and accountability Country Job tranquility Security Creativity Knowledge Self-respect Decisiveness Leadership Serenity Democracy Location Sophistication Ecological awareness Loyalty Stability Economic security Market position Status Effectiveness Meaningful work Supervising others Efficiency Merit Time freedom Ethical practice Money Truth Excellence Nature Wealth Excitement being around people who are open and honest Wisdom Fame Order (tranquility, stability, conformity) Work under pressure Fast living Personal development Work with others Financial gain Freedom Working alone
Thoughts on several of the more interesting personal values listed above:
Simplicity In this time of great complexity and hurry, there is no more important personal value than "simplicity." Taking the time to simplify anything that is overly complex is a very helpful skill in these rapidly accelerating times. Simplifying a work not only streamlines it, but make it more effective and productive, leading to greater results when compared to its former complex arrangement. Strategies: -Take any important work or project in your life and come up with at least two ways to simplify it. -Develop a half dozen ways to simplify your life.
Harmony Harmony is the coming together of unlike elements for common purpose. It is the moving together of varied or opposing forces, so that they emerge in a higher truth that all can benefit from. The value of Teamwork is one variation of the value of Harmony, as is the value of Organization. Harmony is such noble and elevated a value that it can be considered a spiritual value. Strategies: Make harmony a permanent personal value that you believe in and practice. Over the next few days and weeks notice points of conflict that appear in your work and life and seek to implement a higher truth, or point of view, or action in each situation that can harmonize the opposing ideas, conflicts between people, and other forms of opposition. Concern for Others Perhaps the single most powerful way to succeed in life is to have more concern for our fellow human beings. Normally, we are overwhelmingly concerned about our own selves, driven by our own personal motives and ambitions. However, the happiest people literally lose themselves in the feelings, thoughts, and aspirations of others. Are you ready to "forget yourself" and be genuinely interested in the welfare of others? Are you willing to be tolerant and kind to others, listen attentively and silently to their words, be non-judgmental, and open to their opinions and points of view? If you are, you're an excellent candidate for great success in life, not to mention an ever-increasing personal happiness and joy. Strategies: Try a little experiment. When you meet with others, immediately put yourself in their shoes. Think only of what they want. Listen carefully to their thoughts and feelings, and show genuine concern and empathy. Do this for the entire meeting. Now watch how the interaction goes. Watch how the energy level of the other person increases. The other individual becomes more animated and involved.
In addition, if you watch closely, you may notice some interesting things starting to happen. An unthought of point of view or perspective may be raised in the conversation. New ideas or fresh new insights are suddenly revealed. Or, a new interesting idea, project or event might suddenly come out of the discussion. This all happens because you have shifted your concern toward the other person.
SELF-ANALYSIS: -Think about two to five values that have shaped your life. -Now review the list above and consider which one or two new values you would like to implement in your life. Now think about the specific ways you can implement them. Then come up with a detailed action plan (using specific dates for action) to implement the values in your life. Make sure you review your plan down the line to evaluate the progress you are making so far. -Make your values, including, your new values, the cornerstone of your life. Contemplate them deeply and see that they fill all aspects of your life and being.
A Soul Statement is a sentence or two that reflects your Souls Purpose. Before we begin the process of defining our Soul lets that a moment to replenish and cleanse.
Begin the process by silencing the mind. Close your eyes and connect with your breath. Feel the sensation as you breathe in thru your nose. Feel the chest expand with life.
Firmly release the breath thru the mouth releasing all the negative and stressful thoughts with it. As you release feel the shoulder s drop and soften. Feel the neck muscles loosen and the jaw become soft.
Now that you are completely relaxed let’s begin.
Let’s start with the crown chakra; the seventh chakra. It is located just behind the top of the skull. It is the center of spirituality, enlightenment, dynamic thought and energy. It allows for the inward flow of wisdom, and brings the gift of cosmic consciousness. This is also the center of connectedness with the Goddess (God), the place where Spirit energy enters the physical body.
Follow the light as it flows to your third eye chakra located between the eye brows. This is the center for psychic ability, higher intuition, the energies of spirit and light. It also assists in the purification of negative tendencies and in the elimination of selfish attitudes. Through the power of the sixth chakra, you can receive guidance, channel, and tune into your Higher Self.
Allow it to penetrate the throat charka. It is located in the V of the collarbone at the lower neck and is the center of communication, sound, and expression of creativity via thought , speech, and writing. The possibility for change, transformation and healing are located here. The throat is where anger is stored and finally let go of. Feel the white light cleanse all the bottled up energies and gently move them along.
Now we are cleansing the heart charka. The place where all of our energy of love . Spiritual Lessons of - forgiveness, unconditional love, letting go, trust, compassion flow freely into the world.
Travel to the Solar Plexus. It is located two inches below the breastbone in the center behind the stomach. The third chakra is the center of personal power, the place of ego , of passions, impulses, anger and strength. Imagine the white light replenishing the energy of this area.
The Sacral chakra is located two inches below the navel and is rooted into the spine. This center holds the basic needs for sexuality, creativity, intuition, and self-worth. This chakra is also about friendliness, creativity, and emotions. It governs peoples sense of self-worth, their confidence in their own creativity, and their ability to relate to others in an open and friendly way.
The root chakra is located at the base of the spine at the tailbone in back, and the pubic bone in front. This center holds the basic needs for survival, security and safety. The root chakra is powerfully related to our contact with the Earth Mother, providing us with the ability to be grounded into the earth plane. This is also the center of manifestation; making things happen in your life.
Now that we have completely refilled all the energy centers lets envision the roots coming out of our feet and anchoring into mother earth. They are sturdy and secure. Thru these roots we release all the toxins in our body and gently let them flow away from us.
Open your eyes and begin to write your Soul Statement. Do not censor or force the words. Simply allow them to flow from you. After all the words are written assemble them into a few sentences that define your Souls Purpose.
Use the photos to inspire you.
“Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing it is not fish they are after.” Henry David Thoreau
REMEMBER TO GENTLY AND LOVINGLY CARE FOR YOURSELF ~
Calm your Soul by noticing the imbalances in your body and mind and bringing them back into balance through changing your thoughts and actions.
1. Focus on Your Breath
Whenever you are feeling anxious or nervous try to take notice of any changes in your breathing. Slow down rapid paced breaths by replacing them with steady and slow breaths. Just becoming mindful of your breathing often controls it. A daily meditation practice is a good preventative measure for repressing anxieties.
2. Mental Time Out
Clear Your Mind from Troubling Thoughts - Any time you are feeling anxious it is helpful to temporarily clear your mind. Take it moment by moment. By taking small sweet steps with yourself you will gently begin a habit of time out. Try visualizations as a mental escapes that can help you to switch your focus away from anything that is troubling you. Choose an ocean view, desert oasis, or garden path.
3. Treat Yourself
Remove yourself from the chaos and give yourself some quality alone time. Lock yourself in the bathroom and take that much needed soak in the tub. A bubble bath is your ticket to serenity. Enjoying a rejuvenating soak is just one of several ways you can pamper yourself. Try taking a walk in the park, or curling up on the sofa and reading.
4. Release the need to react
Everyone has made the mistake of being over reactive. We compound our conflicts by responding without getting all the facts first. When it seems that the whole world is out to get you and you feel like lashing out right away... Wait! The situation at hand probably does call for a response of some kind, but please slow down your response. You'll handle a trying situation in a calmer state, and come to a resolution sooner if you take time to fully assess the situation. My favorite saying, Get all your ducks in a row before you decide on a response.
5. Create Boundaries
You may need to step back and create some distance between yourself and anyone who is making you feel anxious. It is important to pull back from others when you are feeling overwhelmed so that you are able to reserve your energies. Having protective boundaries in place can also give you a different perspective in order to help you more fully understand and better cope with difficult situations.
6. Nurture Your Inner Child
Oftentimes when we experience situations that make us feel anxious or powerless our thoughts will turn to memories from our childhoods when we experienced fear or loneliness. When children feel small and helpless they look to their parents or guardian for protection. Take a moment to be a caring and loving parent to your inner child. Be gentle, reassuring and loving.
7. Silence That Critical Voice
Sadly, we can be our own worst enemies. Don't berate yourself for not being able to meet your goals or falling short in some way. You're doing the best you can. Just relax. Simply refuse to listen to that critical voice inside your head that says you're not good enough. Take any negative, nagging thought and findit’s opposite. Affirm yourself daily. You are PERFECT JUST AS YOU ARE!
8. Spiritual Retreat
Taking a few minutes out of your hectic day for a mental reprieve or taking a half-hour bubble bath each evening are good stress relievers. Take a vacation! If it is not possible to take a vacation create a “get away” spot in your life. Maybe it’s in your garden, or at a local park. Maybe it’s a corner in your home that has all your favorite spiritual items in it. The idea is to switch physically surroundings so that you can regroup and replenish.
Discover Your Joy
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Veronica Drake vdrake@rcn.com
veronicadrake.net 610.297.6086