SESSION TWO FOR TEACHERS ONLY The University of the State of New York REGENTS HIGH SCHOOL EXAMINATION ENGLISH Wednesday, January 28, 2009 — 1:15 to 4:15 p.m., only SCORING KEY AND RATING GUIDE Mechanics of Rating Updated information regarding the rating of this examination may be posted on the New York State Education Department’s web site during the rating period. Check this web site http://www.emsc.nysed.gov/osa/and select the link “Examination Scoring Information” for any recently posted information regarding this examination. This site should be checked before the rating process for this examination begins and several times throughout the Regents examination period. The following procedures are to be used for rating papers in the Comprehensive Examination in English. More detailed directions for the organization of the rating process and procedures for rating the examination are included in the Information Booklet for Administering and Scoring the Comprehensive Examination in English. Scoring of Multiple-Choice Questions Indicate by means of a check mark each incorrect or omitted answer to multiplechoice questions on the Session Two answer sheet; do not place a check mark beside a correct answer. Use only red ink or red pencil. In the box provided under each part, record the number of questions the student answered correctly for that part. Transfer the number of correct answers for the Part A multiple-choice questions to the appropriate spaces in the box in the upper right corner of each student’s SESSION ONE answer sheet. Session Two Correct Answers Part A (1) 3 (2) 1 (3) 4 (4) 2 (5) 2 (6) 3 (7) 4 (8) 1 (9) 1 (10) 2 The University of the State of New York • THE STATE EDUCATION DEPARTMENT • Albany, New York 12234 ERating of Essays (1) Follow your school’s procedures for training for rating. This process should include: Introduction to the task— • Raters read the task and summarize its purpose, audience, and format • Raters read passage(s) and plan own response to task • Raters share response plans and summarize expectations for student responses Introduction to the rubric and anchor papers— • Trainer reviews rubric with reference to the task • Trainer reviews procedures for assigning scores • Trainer leads review of each anchor paper and commentary (Note: Anchor papers are ordered from high to low within each score level.) Practice scoring individually— • Raters score a set of five papers individually • Trainer records scores and leads discussion until raters feel confident enough to move on to actual scoring (2) When actual rating begins, each rater should record his or her individual rating for a student’s essay on the rating sheet provided, not directly on the student’s essay or answer sheet. Do not correct the student’s work by making insertions or changes of any kind. (3) Each essay must be rated by at least two raters; a third rater will be necessary to resolve scores that differ by more than one point. The scoring coordinator will be responsible for coordinating the movement of papers, calculating a final score for each student’s essay, and recording that information on the student’s answer paper for Session One, and determining the student’s final score for the examination. The chart located on the Department’s web site should be used for determining the final examination score. [2] COMPREHENSIVE ENGLISH — SESSION TWO — continuedSESSION TWO – PART A – SCORING RUBRIC READING AND WRITING FOR LITERARY RESPONSE QUALITY 6 Responses at this level: 5 Responses at this level: 4 Responses at this level: 3 Responses at this level: 2 Responses at this level: 1 Responses at this level: Meaning: the extent to which the response exhibits sound understanding, interpretation, and analysis of the task and text(s) Development: the extent to which ideas are elaborated using specific and relevant evidence from the text(s) Organization: the extent to which the response exhibits direction, shape, and coherence Language Use: the extent to which the response reveals an awareness of audience and purpose through effective use of words, sentence structure, and sentence variety Conventions: the extent to which the response exhibits conventional spelling, punctuation, paragraphing, capitalization, grammar, and usage -establish a controlling idea that reveals an indepth analysis of both texts -make insightful connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in each text -develop ideas clearly and fully, making effective use of a wide range of relevant and specific evidence and appropriate literary elements from both texts -maintain the focus established by the controlling idea -exhibit a logical and coherent structure through skillful use of appropriate devices and transitions -are stylistically sophisticated, using language that is precise and engaging, with a notable sense of voice and awareness of audience and purpose -vary structure and length of sentences to enhance meaning -demonstrate control of the conventions with essentially no errors, even with sophisticated language -establish a controlling idea that reveals a thorough understanding of both texts -make clear and explicit connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in each text -develop ideas clearly and consistently, with reference to relevant and specific evidence and appropriate literary elements from both texts -maintain the focus established by the controlling idea -exhibit a logical sequence of ideas through use of appropriate devices and transitions -use language that is fluent and original, with evident awareness of audience and purpose -vary structure and length of sentences to control rhythm and pacing -demonstrate control of the conventions, exhibiting occasional errors only when using sophisticated language -establish a controlling idea that shows a basic understanding of both texts -make implicit connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in each text -develop some ideas more fully than others, with reference to specific and relevant evidence and appropriate literary elements from both texts -maintain a clear and appropriate focus -exhibit a logical sequence of ideas but may lack internal consistency -use appropriate language, with some awareness of audience and purpose -occasionally make effective use of sentence structure or length -demonstrate partial control, exhibiting occasional errors that do not hinder comprehension -establish a controlling idea that shows a basic understanding of the texts -make few or superficial connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in the texts -develop ideas briefly, using some evidence from the texts -may rely primarily on plot summary -establish, but fail to maintain, an appropriate focus -exhibit a rudimentary structure but may include some inconsistencies or irrelevancies -rely on basic vocabulary, with little awareness of audience or purpose -exhibit some attempt to vary sentence structure or length for effect, but with uneven success -demonstrate emerging control, exhibiting occasional errors that hinder comprehension -convey a confused or incomplete understanding of the texts -make a few connections but fail to establish a controlling idea -are incomplete or largely undeveloped, hinting at ideas, but references to the text are vague, irrelevant, repetitive, or unjustified -lack an appropriate focus but suggest some organization, or suggest a focus but lack organization -use language that is imprecise or unsuitable for the audience or purpose -reveal little awareness of how to use sentences to achieve an effect -demonstrate a lack of control, exhibiting frequent errors that make comprehension difficult -provide minimal or no evidence of textual understanding -make no connections between the texts or among ideas in the texts -are minimal, with no evidence of development -show no focus or organization -are minimal -use language that is incoherent or inappropriate -are minimal, making assessment of conventions unreliable -may be illegible or not recognizable as English [3] • If the student addresses only one text, the response can be scored no higher than a 3. • If the student writes only a personal response and makes no reference to the text(s), the response can be scored no higher than a 1. • Responses totally unrelated to the topic, illegible, incoherent, or blank should be given a 0. • A response totally copied from the text(s) with no original student writing should be scored a 0.Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 6 – A [4]Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 6 – A [5][6] Anchor Level 6 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that reveals an in-depth analysis of both texts, stating that names are very important to people – they not only identify a person, but they become the person’s identity. The response makes insightful connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in Passage I (Ashoke, Gogol’s father, does not realize the identity that is attached to a name) and Passage II (Ezra retains his individuality even though it is not recognized by anyone else). Development Develops ideas clearly and fully, making effective use of a wide range of relevant and specific evidence from Passage I (to Gogol, no other name will describe him and represent him but his own) and from Passage II (He is proud of his name and keeps it with him even when he goes into the night alone). The response uses 3rd person narrative, description, and characterization in Passage I to show Gogol’s feelings about changing his name and personification, imagery and figurative language, and repetition in Passage II to show Ezra’s pride and individuality. Organization Maintains the focus established by the controlling idea on the huge bearing a name has on one’s identity. The response exhibits a logical and coherent structure, moving from Gogol’s response to his “new name” in Passage I (Gogol is afraid to change his name because he does not want to lose his sense of self) to Ezra’s search for recognition in Passage II (Ezra shouts his name to the wind and the sea, but cannot be stripped of his identity and individualism). Appropriate devices and transitions are skillfully used (However, similarly illustrates, Each time, But in this case). Language Use Is stylistically sophisticated, using language that is precise and engaging (Names are a source of security, even pride and She coaxes him to answer truthfully), with a notable sense of voice and awareness of audience and purpose (There are no particular biases to sway the story). The response varies structure and length of sentences to enhance meaning (But Gogol will remain Gogol forever). Conventions Demonstrates control of the conventions with essentially no errors, even with sophisticated language. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 6 in all qualities. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 6 – B [7]Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 6 – B [8][9] Anchor Level 6 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that reveals an in-depth analysis of both texts, stating that a person who decides, ultimately, to not let a situation change who they are is wise and self assured and characters who … choose wisely … stay true to their identities. The response makes insightful connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in Passage I (he ultimately makes the decision to stay true to himself and keep the name Gogol) and Passage II (He chooses to remain true to himself, despite his surroundings). Development Develops ideas clearly and fully, making effective use of a wide range of relevant and specific evidence from Passage I (Gogol grew up identifying himself as Gogol; he is frightened to be suddenly known as Nikhil, especially in a strange new place) and from Passage II (Ezra says, “so I Ezra went out into the night,” suggesting that he does not care what the waves or grass do with his name as long as he knows who he is). The response uses appropriate literary elements (symbolism and characterization) from Passage I and (repetition and personification) from Passage II to further the analysis. Organization Maintains the focus established by the controlling idea on remaining true to self (Despite outside pressures and outward rejections, they both make the wise and self-assured decision to stay true to who they are). The response exhibits a logical and coherent structure, moving from Gogol’s decision making in Passage I (Gogol is able to stay true to himself) to Ezra’s actions in Passage II (repetition of the phrase “I am Ezra” to convey that Ezra is self-assured), and concluding effectively. Appropriate devices and transitions are skillfully used (also, especially, Though, Although, Despite). Language Use Is stylistically sophisticated, using language that is precise and engaging (He is frightened he will lose himself along with his new name, he hesitates at first, both literally and symbolically, Gogol and Ezra knew who they were), with a notable sense of voice and awareness of audience and purpose. The response varies structure and length of sentences to enhance meaning (This is a personal choice we are faced with everyday). Conventions Demonstrates control of the conventions, exhibiting occasional errors in agreement (person … they and person … their) only when using sophisticated language. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 6, although it is somewhat weaker in conventions. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 6 – BAnchor Paper – Part A—Level 5 – A [10][11] Anchor Level 5 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that reveals a thorough understanding of both texts (A person’s identity can be viewed as a foundation for life, but a name can be something imposed by another person or it can be a reflection of one’s inner self). The response makes clear and explicit connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in each text (Passage I describes the struggle of a young boy who has to face a name change and In Passage II, Ezra questions his identity). Development Develops ideas clearly and consistently, with reference to relevant and specific evidence from both texts to describe the characters’ challenges and reactions (Gogol begins to question himself. He feels as though he now has to change his identity and Ezra then begins to question himself, who he is and what he stands for … Ezra believes he has lost himself). The response refers to appropriate literary elements from both texts, identifying characterization, conflict, and point of view for Passage I and conflict and personification for Passage II. Organization Maintains the focus established by the controlling idea that Gogol and Ezra go through personal struggles trying to find themselves because of their names. The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, first addressing in Passage I the fact that Gogol is in a conflict with his parents and their Indian traditions and in Passage II, that Ezra goes through a similar conflict, concluding that Ezra feels his name might be lost … and Gogol worries that he will lose himself if his name is changed to Nikhil. The response uses appropriate transitions (when faced, Suddenly, then begins). Language Use Uses language that is fluent and original (the parents ironically allowed and he felt comfortable with and did not fight for the customs of another time and place), with evident awareness of audience and purpose. The response varies structure and length of sentences to control rhythm and pacing (As Ezra proclaims his name to the earth around him, it is “swallowed up”). Conventions Demonstrates control of the conventions with essentially no errors, even with sophisticated language. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 5, although it is somewhat stronger in conventions. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 5 – B [12][13] Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 5 – B[14] Anchor Level 5 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that reveals a thorough understanding of both texts (A person’s identity can be based upon … a name). The response makes clear and explicit connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in Passage I (Gogol uses his name to define who he is) and in Passage II (the main character uses their name to define their personal identity). Development Develops ideas clearly and consistently, with reference to relevant and specific evidence from Passage I to explain Gogol’s attitude toward his name (Gogol is unsure of why he must use the name Nikhil in school when he already has the name Gogol) and from Passage II to describe Ezra’s connection to his name (Ezra constantly repeats his name). There is no specific reference to a literary element for Passage I. Two literary elements, personification and repetition, are discussed for Passage II. Organization Maintains the focus established by the controlling idea on the defining of self (the main characters use their name to define who they are). The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, first addressing in Passage I Gogol’s desire to keep his birth name (when his parents tell him he must use a different name in school he becomes confused and Despite his parents wishes … he will be known as Gogol) and in Passage II, Ezra’s quest to be recognized (Ezra ignores the fact that nature ignored him because he knows that he is identitified by the name Ezra). Appropriate transitions are used (In both of, During, To the wave, For emphasis). Language Use Uses language that is fluent and original (There are many different aspects that are taken into account and This statement supports the fact), with evident awareness of audience and purpose. The response varies structure and length of sentences to control rhythm and pacing (To the wave, the word Ezra is meaningless). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (appearence, preperation, clear cut, identitified), punctuation (or in some cases a name; In both of these passages names; from India he also; Ezra, despite what nature thinks knows), and agreement (uses their name to define their and a person’s personal identity is their name) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 5, although it is somewhat weaker in conventions. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 5 – C [15]Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 5 – C [16][17] Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 5 – C[18] Anchor Level 5 – C Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that reveals a thorough understanding of both texts, stating that a change of name can cause oneself to lose their own identity and that a persons name makes them who they are. The response makes clear and explicit connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in Passage I (Gogal feels that he is not the same person if he is Nikhil) and in Passage II (Finally, Ezra decides she does not need approval, she is Ezra). Development Develops some ideas more fully than others, with reference to specific and relevant evidence from Passage I (Gogol does not like the idea of being called a different name, Nikhil, in school and Ashoke is very adimant on following culture and tradition). The response uses appropriate literary elements from Passage I (symbolism and characterization) and from Passage II (repetition, metaphor, personification). The symbolism of nicknames showing a lack of culture in America is not supported. The development of Passage II relies on the symbolism of wind, fields, and oceans that are not allowing her to be Ezra. Organization Maintains the focus established by the controlling idea on the search for identity (Ezra and Gogal came very close to losing themselves, but uncovered their identities just in time with their name). The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, moving from the importance of a person’s name to a thorough discussion of each passage, and then to the conclusion that a name can make a person realize who they are. Language Use Uses language that is fluent and original, with evident awareness of audience and purpose (Throughout life, people are constantly trying to find themselves and the change in name symbolizes a change in self). The response varies structure and length of sentences to control rhythm and pacing (Thinking of having a new identity brings tears to Gogal’s eyes). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (Often times, oneself, Gogal, soley, adimant), comma use (identity, and can cause; he is, because; she is, she just), apostrophe use (persons and parents), and agreement (A person can lose themself, can cause oneself to lose their own identity, someone trying to find themselves) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 5, although it is somewhat weaker in development and conventions. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 4 – A [19][20] Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 4 – A Anchor Level 4 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that shows a basic understanding of both texts, stating that a person feels a strong sense of identity in their name. The response makes implicit connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in Passage I (In the end the principal calls him Gogol and he knows his identity) and in Passage II (He is on a beach yelling his name at different elements in nature out of pride). Development Develops ideas clearly and consistently, with reference to relevant and specific evidence from both texts to discuss the importance of a persons name (the boy, Gogol, is happy with his name and doesn’t want to change it and He starts to loose his sense of identity in his name because he is getting no response). The response refers to appropriate literary elements from Passage I (The author uses characterization, The change in setting demonstrates, There is also conflict) and from Passage II (The author uses repitition, The surf is personified, The author uses that similie). Organization Maintains a clear and appropriate focus on the connection between names and identities (Your name is what makes you unique and gives you a sense of identity). The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, basing discussion of Passage I on the use of literary elements and techniques, and then repeating this procedure for Passage II. The lack of transitions affects internal consistency, producing a listing of literary elements. Language Use Uses appropriate language (His home is more traditional in its customs and the school is very new and American and Passage II is a poem about a man telling nature who he is), with some awareness of audience and purpose. The response occasionally makes effective use of sentence structure and length (The change in setting demonstrates the two different aspects of Gogol’s life). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (Kindergarden, repitition, similie) and agreement (person … their name and Passage I show) and frequent errors in punctuation (persons name, home his parents, Gogol but, at school the teachers, principal he won’t, says it he) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 4, although it is somewhat stronger in development. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 4 – B [21][22] Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 4 – B[23] Anchor Level 4 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that shows a basic understanding of both texts (A persons identity is very important to ones self, and if your identity is taken from you, you may feel small or insecure about yourself). The response makes implicit, and sometimes unclear, connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in Passage I (It shows that Gogol thought that being called by his new name was important to him, and not an unfamiliar name) and implicit connections in Passage II (although nobody is around, Ezra still feels ignored or as if he is not identified). Development Develops some ideas more fully than others. The response refers to specific and relevant evidence from Passage I to discuss Gogol and his reaction to a name change (Gogol says that he prefers to be called by his real name, and not his new “good name”) and from Passage II to discuss Ezra’s experience with nature (He calls his name out numerous times, but hears no response, just the sound of the waves crashing, and the wind). The response refers to characterization in Passage I (The author of this novel seems to now characterize Gogol as an insecure person who is afraid to talk) and to symbolism in Passage II, although the one qualified statement about symbolism shows less development (In this passage, it seems that the author almost symbolizes the ocean and wind are people). Organization Maintains the focus established by the controlling idea on the importance of identity (Both authors create that having your identity is important to ones self when it comes to existing in the world). The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, first discussing Passage I as it relates to the impact of identity loss on Gogol’s life, and then Passage II as it relates to Ezra’s identity loss. Appropriate devices and transitions are used (Passage II also deals with the loss of identity, but in a different way). Language Use Uses appropriate language (He did not even hear his own echo when shouting his name), with some awareness of audience and purpose. The response occasionally makes effective use of sentence structure and length (It almost creates a new identity for him, making people know him as someone he is not). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (shys and pricipal), use of the apostrophe (persons, ones, boys’ true name, Gogols, parents decision), and punctuation (school, they; shy, and seems; confused, and asks) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 4, although it is somewhat stronger in organization. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 4 – BAnchor Paper – Part A—Level 4 – C [24][25] Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 4 – C[26] Anchor Level 4 – C Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that shows a basic understanding of both texts, stating that an individuals name is a very large part of who they are. The response makes implicit connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in Passage I (Going into kindergarten with a new name, ment going into kindergarten with a new identity) and in Passage II (Her name is important to her, and she wants it to be known). Development Develops some ideas more fully than others, with reference to specific and relevant evidence from both texts to discuss how names are connected to personality and identity (With the return of his name came the return of his personality and She is Ezra, and Ezra is she). The response appropriately refers to characterization in Passage I (he was characterized to be a quiet and shy child) and to personification in Passage II (Through the use of personification, the author shows how Ezra is willing to fight the whipping wind and the howling surf), although personification is not developed. Organization Maintains a clear and appropriate focus on the importance of being who you are. The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, first discussing in Passage I Gogol’s reaction to a change in name and in Passage II Ezra’s willingness to fight to make her name known. The response lacks internal consistency with no concluding paragraph. Language Use Uses appropriate language, with some awareness of audience and purpose (In the second passage the importance of being who you are, and having your name is revealed). The response occasionally makes effective use of sentence structure and length (The speaker in this passage is screaming her name only for it to be swallowed by the sounds of nature). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (aswell, backround, ment), punctuation (Nikhil, he and you are, and having), and agreement (individual’s name … they and one’s name … their personality) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 4 in all qualities. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 3 – A [27][28] Anchor Level 3 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that shows a basic understanding of the texts (Coming to a new place, going to a different school, and meeting new people may be very difficult for people but easy for others). The response makes a few superficial connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in Passage I (Gogol had to tell people his name was Nikhil) and in Passage II (Ezra wasn’t heard when he talked to people). Development Develops ideas briefly, using some evidence from the texts (The father tells the principal that Nikhil is Gogals good name and The wind was to make it like no body could hear him). The response relies primarily on plot summary. Organization Establishes, but fails to maintain, an appropriate focus on the difficulty of going to a new place and meeting new people. The response exhibits a rudimentary four-paragraph structure, first addressing in Passage I that Gogol is going to a new school, then discussing in Passage II that Ezra is trying to be heard and make friends, and concluding that it is very difficult to come to a new place and meet new people. Language Use Relies on basic vocabulary (As for in passage one, he at least knows English, These two passages are almost similar), with little awareness of audience and purpose. The response exhibits some attempt to vary sentence structure and length for effect, but with uneven success (As to his father leaving to go home she asks him what he wants to be called and he says Gogol). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (certifracates and no body) and punctuation (Gogals good name, to go home she, yelled but he) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 3, although it is somewhat stronger in conventions. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 3 – A[29] Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 3 – B[30] Anchor Level 3 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that shows a basic understanding of the texts (A persons identity is not by their name but knowing who they are inside). The response makes superficial connections between the controlling idea and the ideas in Passage I (Gongol from passage one should realize if he is called Bob … or any thing else he is still the same person). The connection to Passage II is less clear (Ezra in passage two knows who he is no matter what). Development Develops ideas briefly, using some evidence from the texts (Gogols name is being changed and Ezra … can not be heard by the wind the sea or plains but still knows who he is). Organization Establishes, but fails to maintain, an appropriate focus on how a name doesnt matter but rather it is who you are inside that matters. The response exhibits a rudimentary structure, devoting one paragraph to Passage I and Gogol’s identity based on his personality, a one-sentence paragraph to Passage II and Ezra, concluding that your personality is how you are identified. Language Use Relies on basic vocabulary (His name only tells who he is), with little awareness of audience and purpose. The response exhibits some attempt to vary sentence structure and length for effect, but with uneven success (In conclusion, as you can see from both passages it doesnt matter what you name is it matters who you are inside). Conventions Demonstrates emerging control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (Gongol and some one), punctuation (persons identity, Gogols name, doesnt matter), comma use (Gongol from passage one should, Ezra in passage two knows, heard by the wind the sea or plains), and subject/verb agreement (name … what charaterize him and It just identify your) that hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 3 in all qualities. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 3 – C [31][32] Anchor Level 3 – C Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Establishes a controlling idea that shows a basic understanding of Passage I and a confused understanding of Passage II (young children with similar experces are forced to change there names). The response makes few connections to Passage I (Gogle’s parents tell him that it is important to use this name in school and that everyone in there indian heritage has a different name) and to Passage II (Ezra is describing everything and what is going on and she is talking about the wind and the sea). Development Is largely undeveloped, hinting at ideas, but references to the texts are unjustified (There parents are taking away there identy and Flash back is used when ashima [Gogle’s mother] wrote his grandmother a letter). Discussion of Passage II is based solely on literary elements. Organization Establishes, but fails to maintain, an appropriate focus on changing one’s name. The response exhibits a rudimentary structure, first addressing Gogol’s parents in Passage I, then describing literary elements and techniques for both passages, and then concluding the essay. Language Use Relies on basic vocabulary (Those are the two literary elements used in passage one) that is sometimes imprecise (there for “their”). The response exhibits some attempt to vary sentence structure for effect (These two characters, show there self pride in there names and recongnize who they are and stand by there descisons of keeping there names), but with uneven success. Conventions Demonstrates emerging control, exhibiting frequent errors in spelling (experces, Gogle’s, Through out, imegrey, princepal, descisons) and occasional errors in punctuation (identy making; passage one Gogle’s; characters, show) that hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 3, although it is somewhat weaker in development. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 3 – C[33] Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 2 – A[34] Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 2 – B Anchor Level 2 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Conveys an incomplete understanding of the texts (In both passages the controlling idea is always being yourself and fighting for what you want). The response makes a few connections to the texts (The passages talk about how even a little thing like changing your name can really effect the person you are). Development Is incomplete and largely undeveloped, hinting at ideas, but references to Passage I are vague (Even if its something your parents want you have to stick with what you think is best for yourself), and there is no specific reference to Passage II. Organization Suggests a focus on fighting for one’s own identity and suggests some organization. The response begins with a reference to both passages, then addresses the importance of a name, and concludes with a discussion of never giving up. Language Use Relies on basic vocabulary (The passages talk about and stick with what you think), with little awareness of audience and purpose. The response exhibits some attempt to vary sentence structure and length for effect, but with uneven success (If you believe that even your name shouldn’t be changed then you have to fight for it not to be changed). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in punctuation (changed then, its, want you, weakness and) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 2, although it is somewhat stronger in language use and conventions. [35] Anchor Level 2 – C Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Conveys a confused and incomplete understanding of the texts, stating that because of the many different races, traditions, and religions people, everyone, have their own identity. The response makes a few connections to the texts, stating that Gogol from Indian has a completely different identity than Ezra in Passage 2. Development Is incomplete and largely undeveloped, hinting at ideas, but references to Passage I are vague (Because of his traditions he has a “good” name for school. Gogol doesn’t like that though). There is no discussion of Passage II. Organization Suggests a focus on identity and relates it to Gogol’s traditions. The response suggests organization with an introduction and one paragraph devoted to Passage I. There is no paragraph devoted to Passage II and no conclusion. Language Use Uses language that is imprecise for the audience and purpose (Gogol from Indian and Gogol doesn’t like that though cause of his own identity and when he the teacher asks him). The response reveals little awareness of how to use sentences to achieve an effect. Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (insted and Nickhil) and punctuation (religions people and identity and when he the teacher asks him he said) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 2, although it is somewhat stronger in conventions. Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 2 – C[36] Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 1 – A Anchor Level 1 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides no evidence of textual understanding, only making reference to the task through the use of the word identity. Development Is minimal, with no evidence of development beyond the general statements about how to discover someone’s identity. Organization Lacks an appropriate focus but suggests some organization, with an introductory paragraph that addresses a social security number, a paragraph that focuses on an identification card, and a conclusion. Language Use Relies on basic vocabulary (A couple things, Pretty much everyone, # for “number”), with little awareness of audience or purpose. The response exhibits some attempt to vary sentence structure and length, but with uneven success (That would probably be the easiest way to identify somebody). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in punctuation (persons; one, because; to you people), agreement (things is, person … their, somebody … their, someone … their), and consistency in person (you can and I think) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Although the response fits the criteria for Levels 1, 2, 3, and 4, it remains at Level 1 because the response makes no reference to either text. [37] Anchor Paper – Part A—Level 1 – B Anchor Level 1 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides minimal evidence of textual understanding. The response makes no connections between the texts or among the ideas in the texts. Development Is minimal, with no evidence of development. Organization Shows no focus or organization. Language Use Is minimal. The response uses language that is sometimes incoherent (They have wanted Throug and The Sistution). Conventions Is minimal, making assessment of conventions unreliable. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 1 in all qualities. [38] Part A — Practice Paper – APart A — Practice Paper – B [39][40] Part A — Practice Paper – B[41] Part A — Practice Paper – C[42] Part A — Practice Paper – C[43] Part A — Practice Paper – D[44] Part A — Practice Paper – DPart A — Practice Paper – E [45][46] Part A — Practice Paper – EPractice Paper A–Score Level 2 Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 2 in all qualities. Practice Paper B–Score Level 4 Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 4 in all qualities. Practice Paper C–Score Level 3 Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 3 in all qualities. Practice Paper D–Score Level 5 Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 5, although it is somewhat weaker in conventions. Practice Paper E–Score Level 4 Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 4, although it is somewhat stronger in organization. [47]SESSION TWO – PART B – SCORING RUBRIC READING AND WRITING FOR CRITICAL ANALYSIS QUALITY 6 Responses at this level: 5 Responses at this level: 4 Responses at this level: 3 Responses at this level: 2 Responses at this level: 1 Responses at this level: Meaning: the extent to which the response exhibits sound understanding, interpretation, and analysis of the task and text(s) Development: the extent to which ideas are elaborated using specific and relevant evidence from the text(s) Organization: the extent to which the response exhibits direction, shape, and coherence Language Use: the extent to which the response reveals an awareness of audience and purpose through effective use of words, sentence structure, and sentence variety Conventions: the extent to which the response exhibits conventional spelling, punctuation, paragraphing, capitalization, grammar, and usage -provide an interpretation of the "critical lens" that is faithful to the complexity of the statement and clearly establishes the criteria for analysis -use the criteria to make insightful analysis of the chosen texts -develop ideas clearly and fully, making effective use of a wide range of relevant and specific evidence and appropriate literary elements from both texts -maintain the focus established by the critical lens -exhibit a logical and coherent structure through skillful use of appropriate devices and transitions -are stylistically sophisticated, using language that is precise and engaging, with a notable sense of voice and awareness of audience and purpose -vary structure and length of sentences to enhance meaning -demonstrate control of the conventions with essentially no errors, even with sophisticated language -provide a thoughtful interpretation of the "critical lens" that clearly establishes the criteria for analysis -use the criteria to make a clear and reasoned analysis of the chosen texts -develop ideas clearly and consistently, with reference to relevant and specific evidence and appropriate literary elements from both texts -maintain the focus established by the critical lens -exhibit a logical sequence of ideas through use of appropriate devices and transitions -use language that is fluent and original, with evident awareness of audience and purpose -vary structure and length of sentences to control rhythm and pacing -demonstrate control of the conventions, exhibiting occasional errors only when using sophisticated language -provide a reasonable interpretation of the "critical lens" that establishes the criteria for analysis -make implicit connections between criteria and the chosen texts -develop some ideas more fully than others, with reference to specific and relevant evidence and appropriate literary elements from both texts -maintain a clear and appropriate focus -exhibit a logical sequence of ideas but may lack internal consistency -use appropriate language, with some awareness of audience and purpose -occasionally make effective use of sentence structure or length -demonstrate partial control, exhibiting occasional errors that do not hinder comprehension -provide a simple interpretation of the "critical lens" that suggests some criteria for analysis -make superficial connections between the criteria and the chosen texts -develop ideas briefly, using some evidence from the text -may rely primarily on plot summary -establish, but fail to maintain, an appropriate focus -exhibit a rudimentary structure but may include some inconsistencies or irrelevancies -rely on basic vocabulary, with little awareness of audience or purpose -exhibit some attempt to vary sentence structure or length for effect, but with uneven success -demonstrate emerging control, exhibiting occasional errors that hinder comprehension -provide a confused or incomplete interpretation of the "critical lens" -may allude to the "critical lens" but do not use it to analyze the chosen texts -are incomplete or largely undeveloped, hinting at ideas, but references to the text are vague, irrelevant, repetitive, or unjustified -lack an appropriate focus but suggest some organization, or suggest a focus but lack organization -use language that is imprecise or unsuitable for the audience or purpose -reveal little awareness of how to use sentences to achieve an effect -demonstrate a lack of control, exhibiting frequent errors that make comprehension difficult -do not refer to the "critical lens" -reflect minimal or no analysis of the chosen texts -are minimal, with no evidence of development -show no focus or organization -are minimal -use language that is incoherent or inappropriate -are minimal, making assessment of conventions unreliable -may be illegible or not recognizable as English • If the student addresses only one text, the response can be scored no higher than a 3. • If the student writes only a personal response and makes no reference to the text(s), the response can be scored no higher than a 1. • Responses totally unrelated to the topic, illegible, incoherent, or blank should be given a 0. • A response totally copied from the text(s) with no original student writing should be scored a 0. [48]Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 6 – A [49][50] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 6 – A[51] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 6 – A[52] Anchor Level 6 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides an interpretation of the critical lens that is faithful to the complexity of the statement and clearly establishes the criteria for analysis, explaining that essentially, if man does not comprehend something, he will be afraid. The response uses the criteria to make an insightful analysis of The Crucible (In the end, their ignorance leads to the deaths of over twenty people) and Lord of the Flies (The boys’ ignorance results in the death of one of their own, Simon). Development Develops ideas clearly and fully, making effective use of a wide range of relevant and specific evidence from both texts. The response includes references to setting (The dancing and unorthodox activities were punishable by Puritan law as grave offenses and They never actually find … something in the forest), conflict (Although characters such as John Procter and Rebecca Nurse … refuse to listen to them and They automatically assume that there is a threat to their welfare), and plot. Organization Maintains the focus established by the critical lens that humans have an inherent fear of the unknown. The response exhibits a logical and coherent structure, with each paragraph reinforcing the focus on fear as it relates to the texts, and moves from introduction, to textual analysis, to conclusion. Coherence is further strengthened through the skillful use of transitions (As a result, Eventually, However, In these works). Language Use Is stylistically sophisticated, using language that is precise and engaging (seemingly supernatural fit; events spiral completely out of control; a disembodied, fantastical monster; bludgeoned to death), with a notable sense of voice and awareness of audience and purpose. The response varies structure and length of sentences to enhance meaning (Abigail blackmails, bribes, and bullies … and orchestrates an elaborate charade in which she accuses some townspeople of witchcraft and Simon has the misfortune to stumble, feverish and incoherent, upon … their violent “dance”). Conventions Demonstrates control of the conventions with essentially no errors, even with sophisticated language. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 6 in all qualities. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 6 – B [53]Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 6 – B [54][55] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 6 – B[56] Anchor Level 6 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides an interpretation of the critical lens that is faithful to the complexity of the statement and clearly establishes the criteria for analysis, pointing out that ignorance can have negative implications. The response uses the criteria to make an insightful analysis of To Kill a Mockingbird (Boo Radley … is … perceived to be a monster simply because he keeps to himself and does not allow anyone to know a lot about him) and The Crucible (These people were so wrapped up … that the concept of a once-wealthy and respected townsperson turned demonic beast didn’t seem unrealistic). Development Develops ideas clearly and fully, making effective use of a wide range of specific evidence from both texts. The literary elements of characterization (Boo Radley is completely benign and simply misunderstood and A teenage girl named Abigail decided … to further her sick motives) and setting (In the type of southern small town … rumors spread like wildfire and The Puritanical town of Salem … is hell bound and the mob mentality needed to keep this idea going strong) are incorporated into the discussion. Organization Maintains the focus established by the critical lens that people are uninformed and fear the unknown. The response exhibits a logical and coherent structure, introducing the controlling idea that members of their respective small towns … lack the information necessary to make individualized and intelligent decisions, with each paragraph reinforcing the controlling idea as it relates to the texts and ending with a conclusion that reiterates the controlling idea. Transitions are skillfully used (In other words, At the novel’s conclusion, Now, Thankfully). Language Use Is stylistically sophisticated, using language that is precise and engaging (seemingly terrifying, scissor-wielding serial killer, hearsay evidence, swept up in fear-driven causes), with a notable sense of voice and awareness of audience and purpose. The response varies structure and length of sentences to enhance meaning (By the time … the original story has been distorted and Because of the Salemites’ incredible ignorance … fear escalated, mob mentality dominated, and innocent people died, as a result). Conventions Demonstrates control of the conventions with essentially no errors, even with sophisticated language. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 6 in all qualities. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 5 – A [57]Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 5 – A [58]Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 5 – A [59][60] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 5 – A[61] Anchor Level 5 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a thoughtful interpretation of the critical lens that clearly establishes the criteria for analysis (Fear is a fabrication of the human mind. We always fear what we do not understand). The response uses the criteria to make a clear and reasoned analysis of Lord of the Flies (If the boys had listened to the logical … they would not have acted … in fear of an unknown being) and Macbeth (Macbeth’s fear stemmed from that of the unknown). Development Develops ideas clearly and consistently. The response makes reference to relevant and specific details in discussing fear (the fear of the “beastie” soon compells the boys and His fear of being punished) and ignorance (the truth was that there was no beastie and If he had not been so fearful of the unknown, he may have been able to conceal his crimes) in both texts. The appropriate literary elements of setting (situated on a deserted island), characterization (become more barbaric and His paranoia), and conflict (try to quell such fears and fear of being found) are used. Organization Maintains the focus established by the critical lens on the idea that fear always stems from a seed of ignorance. The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, first addressing the critical lens, then explaining how characters from each text are instilled with fear as a result of unknown beings or outcomes, and concluding by refocusing on the critical lens. Appropriate transitions are used (another work and During one of these). Language Use Uses language that is fluent and original, with evident awareness of audience and purpose (Since we do not fully understand the universe beyond the Milky Way, we fabricate creatures and naturally fear them), although some repetitiveness (“beastie”) and awkwardness exists (His paranoia … caused him to commit many more needed than he needed to conceal … intentions). The response varies structure and length of sentences to control rhythm and pacing (Just as the ancient Greeks feared hurricanes and other major storms, we fear events we cannot explain). Conventions Demonstrates control of the conventions, exhibiting occasional errors in usage (king for ambition and him for “himself”) only when using sophisticated language. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 5 in all qualities. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 5 – B [62][63] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 5 – B[64] Anchor Level 5 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a thoughtful interpretation of the critical lens by disagreeing with it (it is clear that fear does not come from ignorance, but from acknowlegement of the truth). The response uses the criteria to make a clear and reasoned analysis of The Giver (Once Jonas became aware of the true pain … his thoughts became flooded with fear & concern) and Death of a Salesman (the pain in the Loman family is not in response to being kept in the dark … but in accepting the truth). Development Develops ideas clearly and consistently. The response makes reference to relevant and specific evidence in both texts to demonstrate how the authors use theme (In … The Giver … ignorance is bliss and a main theme in Death of a Salesman is illusion vs. reality … his illusions protect his fragile mental state, keeping him unaware of his true surroundings), conflict (Jonas … is divided as to whether or not it is his responsibility to share these memories), and mood (Willy’s wife & children were forced to live in fear) to support the idea that ignorance can protect people from the factors which cause fear. Organization Maintains the focus on the idea that fear does not spring from ignorance, but from exposure to the truth. The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, first refuting Emerson’s statement and then defending this position through a discussion of both works (Jonas decides that revealing the pain … would result in massive chaos & fear and when the Loman family discovers Willy’s attempts … they are forced to live each day in fear). Appropriate transitions are used (In this particular community and This theme disproves). Language Use Uses language that is fluent and original (He decides to escape the confines of his imaginary reality), although the use of the ampersand is inappropriate. The response reveals an evident awareness of audience and purpose, and varies structure and length of sentences to control rhythm and pacing (Although this endless quest may result in periods of fear, we cannot let that fear hinder the rest of the journey). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (reciever, untill, suceeded), punctuation (it’s people and “Death of a Salesman”), and grammar (When one … they and no one … their) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 5, although it is somewhat weaker in conventions. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 5 – C [65][66] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 5 – C[67] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 5 – C[68] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 5 – C Anchor Level 5 – C Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a thoughtful interpretation of the critical lens that clearly establishes the criteria for analysis (without knowledge … our minds register the risk that this unknown could … harm us … we begin to fear it). The response uses the criteria to make a clear and reasoned analysis of Native Son (the story of all those who have ever feared the unknown) and The Crucible (demonstrates the danger of allowing ignorance to produce fear). Development Develops some ideas more fully than others, with reference to specific and relevant evidence from Native Son, integrating references to the controlling idea with the literary elements of characterization (Bigger is characterized as living in fear), conflict (conflict … occurrs when Bigger accidentally suffocates … Mary), and symbolism (he has become representative of what can happen when we let ignorence drive us to fear). The discussions of theme (tragedy of these trials) and setting (Puritan times … of extreme ignorance) in The Crucible are less specific. Organization Maintains a focus on Emmerson’s statement that “fear always springs from ignorence.” The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, starting with a thorough interpretation of the lens, followed by body paragraphs discussing how in each work ignorence fueled fear, and concluding with a return to the lens. Appropriate transitions are used throughout (This principle of, This conflict continues, Another novel that demonstrates, Because of this setting). Language Use Uses language that is fluent and original (witchcraft essentially is a vague explanation for inexplicable events), with evident awareness of audience and purpose (I agree with and when we let ignorence drive us to fear). The response varies structure and length of sentences to control rhythm and pacing (He is poor and they are rich. He is black and they are white). Conventions Demonstrates control of the conventions, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (ignorence, shauffer, occurrs), punctuation (knowledge we, characterized demonstrates, now it), and capitalization (god, the bible, the crucible) only when using sophisticated language. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 5, although it is somewhat weaker in development. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 4 – A [69][70] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 4 – A[71] Anchor Level 4 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a reasonable interpretation of the critical lens that establishes the criteria for analysis (people fear what they do not know and what they do not care to know). The response uses the criteria to make a clear analysis of To Kill a Mockingbird (Without making an attempt to discover the truth, Scout chose to fear Boo Radley). The response makes implicit connections between the criteria and Lord of the Flies (the boys feared the man because they did not know what he was). Development Develops some ideas more fully than others. The response uses specific and relevant evidence from To Kill a Mockingbird to explain why the children feared Boo Radley (Supposedly Boo Radley had attacked his parents), but the discussion of theme is less specific (human fairness). The response explains that the boys confusedly believed that the dead body was a monster, but it is less specific in explaining why the boys developed fear and became uncooperative (While at first the boys get along … a fear emerges). Organization Maintains the focus established by the critical lens that it is true that fear is the result of what we do not know. The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, explaining in separate paragraphs the fears of the children in each text, and then explaining why facts would have negated the fears. The response uses appropriate transitions (For this reason, The ignorance of the characters also causes fear, the two works of literature). Language Use Uses appropriate language (A common occurrence and Throughout the course of the book, this fear persisted), with some awareness of audience and purpose. The response shows some awareness of audience and purpose and occasionally makes effective use of sentence structure (The three children had learned from gossip … the story of Boo Radley, a neighbor). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in punctuation (the protagonist [Scout] her brother [Jem] and her friend, Supposedly Boo Radley, The two works of literature To Kill a Mockingbird and Lord of the Flies both) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 4, although it is somewhat stronger in organization. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 4 – B [72][73] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 4 – B Anchor Level 4 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a reasonable interpretation of the critical lens that establishes the criteria for analysis (the fear the unknown). The response makes implicit connections between the criteria and Killer’s Cousins (He had to over come his fear) and The Catcher in the Rye (He finally asked for help and got over his fear). Development Develops some ideas more fully than others. The response uses specific and relevant evidence to explain that both characters feared what others thought of them (he lives with the fear that everyone is judging him and he was afraid of what people thought about him because he did drugs). The response is less specific about the information that helped them (He now didn’t need to worry and He finally found the light). Organization Maintains a clear and appropriate focus that fear is only produced through not knowing. The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas, explaining the lens and showing in separate paragraphs how each character’s fears were overcome through another person’s help (he found someone who could share thought and a younger sister … through her happiness he knew he didn’t have to be afarid). The concluding advice is inconsistent (you have to be confident). Language Use Uses appropriate language (Fear is one poweful emotion and elaborates on this idea), with some awareness of purpose (This is a perfect example). The response occasionally makes effective use of sentence structure (Fear may be strong, but it can be beaten). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (totaly, Forexample, afarid), punctuation (head on they, sister too, Killer’s Cousins he), and agreement (someone faces their fear and cousins revealed that she) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 4 in all qualities. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 4 – C [74][75] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 4 – C[76] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 4 – C[77] Anchor Level 4 – C Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a reasonable interpretation of the critical lens (People use ignorance to hide their true fear) that establishes the criteria for analysis. The response makes implicit connections between the criteria and Lord of the Flies (it is easier to just be afraid of some creature) and The Chosen (he is ignorant to people to hide the fear of change). Development Develops some ideas more fully than others. The response states that for the boys in Lord of the Flies and the rabbi in The Chosen, ignorance is used as a defense mechanism. The response refers to Golding’s use of symbolism (the Beastie … fear on the island), but references to imagery are less specific (The image that Golding creates … young boy’s trying to … hide their true fears). Organization Maintains an appropriate focus that ignorance is used to hide fear. The response exhibits a logical sequence of ideas by explaining the critical lens, then discussing in one paragraph how ignorance affects the boys in Lord of the Flies (Because they are ignorant of their true fear, they lead themselves to destruction), and in a separate paragraph how the friend’s father in The Chosen is being ignorant to hide his true fear of self-consciousness. Each paragraph discusses two literary devices and a concluding paragraph restates the critical lens. The presence of repetition in the conclusion weakens internal consistency. Language Use Uses appropriate language (Potok also uses irony to show ignorance hiding fear). The response exhibits some awareness of audience (As a reader, one can see). Conventions Demonstrates emerging control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (surpress, Rabi, Hasidan, Torrah), punctuation (or more so the, boy’s it is, boy named Reuben’s father and Reuben’s friend’s father), grammar (is ignorant to Reuben and is ignorant to things and people), and usage (the boys’ ignorance to and he is ignorant to people to hide the fear) that hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 4, although it is somewhat weaker in conventions. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 3 – A [78][79] Anchor Level 3 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a simple interpretation of the critical lens that suggests some criteria for analysis (fear always comes from a lack of understanding). The response makes superficial connections between the criteria and To Kill a Mockingbird (Jem and Scout … are afraid of him) and The Hobbit (Bilbo Baggins … doesn’t understand what was going on outside of the Shire). Development Develops ideas briefly, using some evidence from the texts, explaining that Mr. Radley rarely leaves his house and never talks to anyone and Bilbo … wanted nothing to do with the world outside the Shire. The response relies primarily on plot summary. Organization Establishes, but fails to maintain, an appropriate focus on characters who are afraid due to their ignorance. The response exhibits a rudimentary structure by referring to the lens at the beginning, following with separate paragraphs summarizing the texts, and ending with a conclusion. Language Use Relies on basic vocabulary. The response exhibits some attempt to vary sentence structure and length for effect, but with uneven success (Jem and Scout Finch are afraid of Boo Radley). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in punctuation (its and scare them. Such as) and grammar (Bilbo thought that what happens and once said by Ralph Waldo Emerson) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 3, although it is somewhat stronger in conventions. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 3 – B [80][81] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 3 – B Anchor Level 3 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a simple interpretation of the critical lens that suggests some criteria for analysis (fear always comes from ignorance). The response makes superficial connections between the criteria and To Kill a Mockingbird (there is alot of fear but it comes from the ignorance of a rumor) and A Streetcar Named Desire (Blanche feared everything). Development Develops ideas briefly, using some evidence from the texts (Fear is a big part of the story and she feared what was going to happen to her), but relies primarily on plot summary. Organization Establishes, but fails to maintain, an appropriate focus (There is alot of ignorance and fear in both). The response exhibits a rudimentary structure, presenting an introduction, separate paragraphs for each text, and a conclusion which ends with an irrelevant statement (I believe it true and that Ive seen it before). Language Use Relies on basic vocabulary. The response attempts to vary sentence structure, but with uneven success (The literary elements used in this story are theme, Characterization). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (lieing and alot), punctuation (there neighbor Boo Radley, thats, your ignorant), and capitalization (Made, Ignorance, Setting) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 3, although it is somewhat stronger in conventions. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 3 – C [82][83] Anchor Level 3 – C Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a simple interpretation of the critical lens that suggests some criteria for analysis (“Fear is always shown by ignorant people”). The response makes superficial connections between the criteria and The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (during this time, the white community was racist towards the black man) and The Scarlet Letter (Many people men and women … feared the people around them worked for Satan). Development Is incomplete and largely undeveloped, hinting at ideas, but references to the text are vague (a black man such as the protagonist Jim did not kill Huck Finn and both of which have two societies that are ignorant and prejudice). Organization Establishes, but fails to maintain, an appropriate focus. The response exhibits a rudimentary structure, presenting an introduction, separate paragraphs focusing on the texts, and a conclusion, but contains inconsistencies (a countless number of women were being accused of witchcraft and they were capsules for demonic spirits). Language Use Relies on basic vocabulary. The response attempts to vary sentence structure, but with uneven success (This is certainly true in Many works of literature). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (Ester Prinn, adultry, supersitious), punctuation (Adventure’s and communities racism), and usage (prejudicy and to) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 3, although it is somewhat stronger in conventions and weaker in development. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 3 – CAnchor Paper – Part B—Level 2 – A [84][85] Anchor Level 2 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides an incomplete interpretation of the critical lens, stating that when you are ignorant you fear as well. The response alludes to the critical lens, but does not use it to analyze Julius Caesar and Romeo and Juliet. Development Develops ideas briefly, using some evidence from the text (Brutus agreed that Caesar should be killed and Romeo … had fallen in love with Juliet). The response relies primarily on plot summary. Organization Establishes, but fails to maintain, an appropriate focus on fear from ignorance. The response exhibits a rudimentary structure, with an introduction, a paragraph discussing Julius Caesar, and two paragraphs discussing Romeo and Juliet. The response concludes by repeating the critical lens, ending with the statement when you are ignorant you fear as well. Language Use Uses language that is imprecise (Montague was Romeo and the two to get married). The response reveals little awareness of how to use sentences to achieve an effect. Conventions Demonstrates a lack of control, exhibiting frequent errors in spelling (eachother and vise versa), punctuation (Caesars rule, In conclusion both, ignorance” which), grammar (Brutus agreed … that they will kill, Both book have, Romeo and Juliet with the conflicting families), and usage (from the families and the Capulets a) that make comprehension difficult. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 2, although it is somewhat stronger in development and organization. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 2 – B [86] Anchor Level 2 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a confused and incomplete interpretation of the critical lens (people Who are ignorant always have fear built up inside of them). The response alludes to the critical lens but refers to only one text, The Crucible. Development Is incomplete and largely undeveloped. The response refers to John Proctor as being afraid because the people are going to prosecute him, but references to the text are vague, with Proctor’s ignorance hinted at, but not explained. Organization Suggests a focus on the critical lens, but lacks organization. The response consists of one paragraph that begins with a restatement of the lens, followed by an interpretation of the lens and references to John Proctor. Language Use Relies on basic vocabulary (shows fear springing out, being judged … that he worships the devil, has these imaginery), with little awareness of audience or purpose. The response exhibits some attempt to vary sentence structure for effect, but with uneven success (Now while he is being ignorant … village people are going to prosecute him). Conventions Demonstrates emerging control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (Crucibal and imaginery) and punctuation (spells he and ignorant he has) that hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 2, although it is somewhat stronger in language use and conventions. [87] Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 2 – C Anchor Level 2 – C Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides a confused and incomplete interpretation of the critical lens (after they have done something Bad … they begun to fear). The response does not use the critical lens when analyzing the single text, Black Boy. Development Is incomplete and largely undeveloped. The response hints at the idea of the young man in Black Boy being afraid that treating others badly will harm himself, but references to the text are vague (the Boy began to Drink … call People out in the Street Names). The response discusses only one text. Organization Suggests a focus on the critical lens by discussing the idea that people are afraid for themselves when they treat others badly. The response suggests some organization with an introductory paragraph and a paragraph using Black Boy as an example (I am Reading Now … “Black Boy”), but offers no conclusion and statements about Black Boy are loosely related. Language Use Uses language that is imprecise and unsuitable (like in, at the Moment, A young Black Boy growing up going there). The response reveals little awareness of how to use sentences to achieve an effect. Conventions Demonstrates a lack of control, exhibiting frequent errors in spelling (consince, manythings, differcult, a nother), punctuation (ignorance”,; ‘Named; People different), capitalization (he was, a Very, the Boy began to Drink), and usage (of many things and who’s) that make comprehension difficult. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 2 in all qualities. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 1 – A [88] Anchor Level 1 – A Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides an incomplete interpretation of the critical lens (When you get ignorgant and forget the danger you make mistakes). The response contains no analysis of any texts. Development Is incomplete. The response hints at ideas, but references are of a personal nature with no mention of any texts. Organization Suggests a focus on the critical lens, but is brief and shows no organization. Language Use Relies on basic vocabulary (He doesn’t eat his food because a bigger cat eats it), with little awareness of audience or purpose. The response exhibits some attempt to vary sentence structure and length for effect, but with uneven success (For example Mrs. Thomas’s cat peek-a-boo). Conventions Demonstrates partial control, exhibiting occasional errors in spelling (excpirence), punctuation (Spring’s, example Mrs, danger you), and capitalization (Spring’s and peek-a-boo) that do not hinder comprehension. Conclusion: Although the response fits the criteria for Levels 2, 3, and 4, it remains at Level 1 because the response makes no reference to any text. Anchor Paper – Part B—Level 1 – B [89] Anchor Level 1 – B Quality Commentary The response: Meaning Provides an incomplete interpretation of the critical lens, stating that people only fear what they do not know, if you understand something there is no reason to fear it. The response does not use the critical lens to analyze any texts. Development Is minimal, with no evidence of development. Organization Suggests a focus on the critical lens, but is too brief to demonstrate any organization. Language Use Is minimal. Conventions Is minimal, making assessment of conventions unreliable. Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 1, although it is somewhat stronger in meaning and organization. Part B — Practice Paper – A [90]Part B — Practice Paper – A [91][92] Part B — Practice Paper – APart B — Practice Paper – B [93]Part B — Practice Paper – B [94][95] Part B — Practice Paper – BPart B — Practice Paper – C [96]Part B — Practice Paper – D [97][98] Part B — Practice Paper – DPart B — Practice Paper – E [99][100] Part B — Practice Paper – E[101] Practice Paper A–Score Level 4 Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 4 in all qualities. Practice Paper B–Score Level 5 Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 5 in all qualities. Practice Paper C–Score Level 2 Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 2 in all qualities. Practice Paper D–Score Level 4 Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 4 in all qualities. Practice Paper E–Score Level 3 Conclusion: Overall, the response best fits the criteria for Level 3, although it is somewhat stronger in conventions. Regents Comprehensive Examination in English Map to Learning Standards Key Ideas Part of Test Listening and writing for information and understanding Session One – Part A Reading and writing for information and understanding Session One – Part B Reading and writing for literary response Session Two – Part A Reading and writing for critical analysis and evaluation Session Two – Part B StandardsThe Chart for Determining the Final Examination Score for the January 2009 Regents Examination in Comprehensive English will be posted on the Department’s web site http://www.emsc.nysed.gov/osa/on Wednesday, January 28, 2009. Conversion charts provided for previous administrations of the Regents Examination in Comprehensive English must NOT be used to determine students’ final scores for this administration. Submitting Teacher Evaluations of the Test to the Department Suggestions and feedback from teachers provide an important contribution to the test development process. The Department provides an online evaluation form for State assessments. It contains spaces for teachers to respond to several specific questions and to make suggestions. Instructions for completing the evaluation form are as follows: 1. Go to www.emsc.nysed.gov/osa/exameval. 2. Select the test title. 3. Complete the required demographic fields. 4. Complete each evaluation question and provide comments in the space provided. 5. Click the SUBMIT button at the bottom of the page to submit the completed form.